Good morning. My name is Annie and I am a compulsive overeater.
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about accountability. I say that I want to do certain things with my eating and my exercise. I am even good at keeping up with it for a day or two. But when the “newness” and “excitement” of whatever it is I’ve decided to do wears off, I stop doing it. At least I stop doing it on a regular basis. I still track my food. I still read my daily literature. I still ride my stationary bike.
I just don’t do those things every day.
I don’t even remember to do them all on the same day.
The OA group that I am a part of recently started an accountability group. For a few weeks now, I have thought about going. This week I actually went. It was one of the worst OA meetings I have ever been to.
OK, so calling it a bad meeting probably isn’t fair, especially since I could see that the others in the room were getting a lot out of the meeting. But it didn’t work for me. I don’t know if the meeting was a bad fit or if I was just in a bad frame of mind for it. Heaven knows that I didn’t put puch into the meeting.
It was odd for me from the beginning. Rather than using the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions of OA, they were reading from the AA 12 and 12. Why that was uncomfortable to me, I don’t know.
Anyway, one thing they talked about was emailing their food plan and action plan to each other; they said that keeps them accountable for following through with what they are committing to do. Now THAT is something that I can get into!! Nearly every morning, I make up a plan of what I am going to do that day, and I have in my head what I will eat for the day. But I have yet to share it with anyone. If no one knows what I have planned, they can’t get on my case to make sure that I am doing it. Yeah, OK, so I know that it’s not up to anyone else to stick to my program. But I do think having some encouragement throughout the day would be helpful for me.
Who can I ask to be my accountability partner, though? I suppose I could post it all here on my blog. Only I don’t know how many actually read it. (It’s not like I have been very good about keeping up with this blog in the past few months!) I’d prefer to share with someone I KNOW will respond to me daily, pushing me to stick with my plans. Maybe my sponsor will help. And my best friend. I suppose I will have to ask them.