Acceptance

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My name is Annie and I am a compulsive overeater.

This week, I purchased a couple of books to help me in my OA recovery plan.  One is called Drop the Rock.  It was recommended by the other members of my Monday night meeting group.  The focus of this book is Step 6 and Step 7.  On Mondays, we are going through The Twelve-Step Workbook of Overeaters Anonymous.  As we have just finished with Step 6 and are about to start work on Step 7 (though I freely admit that I am not that far along in my recovery yet), we have decided to start reading Drop the Rock on Monday nights.  I think that working through that might help me to adjust better when it is time for me to fully work those steps in my own life.

The other book I bought is not an official OA book, though I thought it was when I ordered it.  It is called Beyond Feast or Famine: Daily affirmations for compulsive eaters.  It is 365 daily readings to help with overcoming the food addiction.  I started reading it with the reading dated January 18, which is the day that the book arrived in my mailbox.  To be honest, I have not been enjoying the book.  Maybe it is me—I am sure the writings are good, but I just don’t feel like they are for me.  Still, I am pushing through, reading one affirmation every day.  Eventually, I am sure I will come across something that hits home with me, something that I can apply to my own life and recovery plan.

Surprisingly, I found something today that hit home with me.  At the end of the reading, I read the words, “My goal is to accept myself.”  Sure there was more to it than just that.  Something about how accepting myself will help me to stop trying to change all of those around me.  But the words “accept myself” really got to me.  I can’t tell you the last time I really felt like I could accept myself for who I am.  And if I can’t accept me, how can I ever expect anyone else to accept me?

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